Raise your hands if you scored!
Hands in the air Nuts fans and welcome to World Series softball. Tonight the Nuts take on the other Nuts for the biggest rematch in CO softball history. But first a little math quiz…stay with me folks…(2 runs + 2 more runs) = 4 runs….easy right?…Once again…(3 runs + 1 run) = (you guessed it) 4 runs…Remember that…it will come in handy later. Okay….now for a little riddle for y’all to ponder on during the course of this blog…What do these 4 people have in common…Kara (KP) Perkins, Paul (Boo-ya) Santana, Jose (Every time) Baldonado, and Dianna (D-Lite) Tavira?
Answers are due at the end of class…but only those ‘raising their hand’ will be recognized! Hands in the air Nuts….hands in the air!
Off we go…Steve (Monstuhr) Stuhr leads things off for the Red team with a single…always a good sign when the lead-off man gets on base…right? But the Black team foils the plan when they make a hot double play between Darryl (Double D) Dearborn and Meaghan (Stops Everything) Smith. With 2 down Darryl’s Nuts walk Duke (To the Trees) Low and the ladies make a great play to end the Red’s 1st attempt to score…with Jeanine (CoCo Nut) Lussier to Meaghan for the final out.
Bottom of the 1st…Darryl’s Nuts take their turn…Mike (the Cleaner) McClean leads off and takes his base…Double D slams a double and the Red Nuts decide to walk Alex (Gibby) Gibson…so they could get to Julie I reckon…but little did they know she was the secret ringer of the evening…and she doubles…making it look so easy! Brian (Be-Lee-ve) Lee is up next and performs a little clean-up by knocking everyone in with a home run….before we know it the ‘Darryls’ are up by 5! Now it should be noted that the Red team was not just standing around during this slam-a-thon…they brought back the famous…Tinkers to Evans to Chance…I mean…the AP to KP Connection three times in a row! Hot!
To the 2nd…Paul leads off with a double and with some help from Jose and Monique…Paul scores…the Red team is on the board! The Black team makes some great plays to stop the Reds in their tracks with Mike really cleaning things up!…In fact we’ll call this the “Inning of Mike” because he had a hand in every play! A strikeout for 1…Mike to Meghan for 2…and a great line drive catch for 3! Holla!
Bottom of the 2nd…the Black team steps up with Robert (Reaton) Eaton hitting a single…Amy (the Ocho) slamming a single…hold please…yeah Amy! Go Amy! That was hot…woo-hoo! Okay…I done…then well…the Red team pounced! Holding Darryl’s Nuts to well…no runs for the inning anyway…Duke makes a spectacular double play that almost looked like he was ‘tippy tippy toeing’ to tap 2nd before he rifle-arm throws it to KP for 2…I mean you could hear it! And see the smoke in KP’s glove! Then to finish it off Duke again throws to KP for the 3rd out…and now to the 3rd…anyone craving a pickle?
Everyone loves a good pickle don’t they? We just don’t have enough of them! Special thanks to Alex (Marquez) Porter for delivering the best pickle we have seen in years…I wish we could replay! So…after the pickle dust settles Jorge (Coche) Haynes singles…Kara doubles and Sean singles…KP’s Nuts have 1 more run on the board! The Black team holds onto their lead for another inning thanks to Darryl’s pickle dance for 1…a Meaghan to Meaghan out at 1st for 2…and Mike tags someone (I forget who) for 3…The bottom of the 3rd is one of those 3-up, 3-down kind of innings with Jose making a great line drive catch for 1…the AP to KP Connection for 2…and Paul making a great catch for 3…onto the 4th!
To the 4th…
Sorry that’s all I got….cause not much happened during this inning…except another intentional walk for Duke…and while I understand the strategery…it really sucks…its kinda like driving 30 miles per hour on the Autobahn…or never bothering to punch your Porsche out of 2nd gear…or one of those bad nightmares where you are trying to run for your life and just can’t quite get it going…oh…sorry I digress…I just like the hits man!
To the 5th then…the inning of mathematical enlightenment and hands in the air exercises…off we go. To be honest I’m not sure who led off for the Reds…cause these batting orders land me in the confusional! But we’ll say it was Paul…who sets the tone and slams himself a double…Dianna follows with a single…then Jose singles and the runs are starting to come in! More action follows as Kara singles and Alex doubles…and then a flash runs by us towards first base and all I hear is Sue’s voice yelling…RBI! I like that…she pay attention man! Before you know it the Reds have 4 more runs tying things up at 6 – 6…For the Black team it was the inning of Meaghan…with Darryl throwing to her for 1…Reaton to Meaghan for 2…and Reaton again to Meaghan for 3! Inning over…it’s 6 – 6…no really it is!
Enter the best little dispute in baseball…Nuts style! I mean this is better than anything that Club Fed ever brought to the table…we funny! So…it seems that the Black team was under the impression that the Reds only scored 3 runs in the 5th…thus making the score 6 – 5…and where did they get that impression? Hmmmm?? Well…I know they weren’t under the influence of Jell-O shots so it couldn’t have been that…Hmmmm?? Who planted the seed? And where did that person get their information?? From the tabloids…or some little bird…or the passengers in the JetBlue flight overhead?? Who knows…but they’re fired as Nuts spokesperson!
So…from there more “friendly” discussions ensue that include most of the players…most of the fans…and Blue…did someone wake up Blue by the way? Was it 4 runs…was it 3 runs…was it 4 runs…was it 3 runs?? Then the light bulbs clicked on! “Raise your hand if you scored” Utter genius! I mean forget the two scorekeepers…they don’t know what they’re doing…"raise your hands!” This has never been seen before on the field…somebody call MLB cause they NEED to employ this tactic right away! Just think of all the disputed plays that can be avoided in the future…genius I tell you!
Finally everyone settles down and the correct score is awarded…everyone hugs and decide we can go outside and play nicely together again…the team mom’s agree not to ground anyone for rough housing or name calling and off we go for more funsies!
The final inning people…Sean leads off for the Reds…he takes his base…Steve delivers a home run…Kara triples…that’s a triple people! Duke takes his base…Sue singles…Paul slams a grand slam-o-rama ding dong home run…Sin-D takes her base…Jose takes his base…Monique singles and 8 more runs have landed! The defense plays hard as Mike throws to Meaghan for 1…Meaghan makes a great stop for 2…and Jeanine makes a catch for 3…Great job Nuts and Nuts…collect your World Series rings on the way out…Bling!
A Few Collectable Quotes regarding that…you know…incident:
“If it wasn’t for home plate, no one would have scored” – Wally
“Roxy, get your muzzle…we need it” – The Ocho
"In a thousand years, who's going to care about that extra run?" – DD
I was heard to yell repeatedly from the first base coaching box: "Give it up, Robert. Let's just play the game" Now this coming from the one who won the final score pool and two innings for a grand total of $250. Little did I know that lobbying for that one run would be such a windfall for me - Pete Rose
"After the game, I laid down in bed looking up at the stars in the sky tyring to figure out just who scored in the game and thought to myself, "Wait, what happened to the ceiling?" - Be-Lee-Ve
“Raise your hand if you scored” - Everyone
And a few Stats for my Peeps:
Number of AP to KP Connections: 5
Number of double plays: 3
Darryl and Meaghan
Duke and Kara
Duke, Sin-D and Kara…hot!
Number of great plays involving Meaghan at 1st: 10
Number of great plays involving Kara at 1st: 12
Number of pickle plays: 2…but Alex’s was the best!
Total home runs: 3
Final score: Red Nuts 14 – Black Nuts 9
A few more words
…so by now you should have guessed what those 4 people in the beginning had in common…I see lots of hands…oh wait…I’m sorry…that’s just Robert’s cubicle! Hands in the air people…hands in the air!
And finally…Congratulations to Darryl’s team who have earned themselves a spot at the finals…um…against the Longshots…yeah…um…good luck with that!
No…I’m kidding…come out and cheer them on September 21st…same place…7:45! And if you have ever had the title of “Ringer” on your resume…Please see Darryl…Holla!
Answers are due at the end of class…but only those ‘raising their hand’ will be recognized! Hands in the air Nuts….hands in the air!
Off we go…Steve (Monstuhr) Stuhr leads things off for the Red team with a single…always a good sign when the lead-off man gets on base…right? But the Black team foils the plan when they make a hot double play between Darryl (Double D) Dearborn and Meaghan (Stops Everything) Smith. With 2 down Darryl’s Nuts walk Duke (To the Trees) Low and the ladies make a great play to end the Red’s 1st attempt to score…with Jeanine (CoCo Nut) Lussier to Meaghan for the final out.
Bottom of the 1st…Darryl’s Nuts take their turn…Mike (the Cleaner) McClean leads off and takes his base…Double D slams a double and the Red Nuts decide to walk Alex (Gibby) Gibson…so they could get to Julie I reckon…but little did they know she was the secret ringer of the evening…and she doubles…making it look so easy! Brian (Be-Lee-ve) Lee is up next and performs a little clean-up by knocking everyone in with a home run….before we know it the ‘Darryls’ are up by 5! Now it should be noted that the Red team was not just standing around during this slam-a-thon…they brought back the famous…Tinkers to Evans to Chance…I mean…the AP to KP Connection three times in a row! Hot!
To the 2nd…Paul leads off with a double and with some help from Jose and Monique…Paul scores…the Red team is on the board! The Black team makes some great plays to stop the Reds in their tracks with Mike really cleaning things up!…In fact we’ll call this the “Inning of Mike” because he had a hand in every play! A strikeout for 1…Mike to Meghan for 2…and a great line drive catch for 3! Holla!
Bottom of the 2nd…the Black team steps up with Robert (Reaton) Eaton hitting a single…Amy (the Ocho) slamming a single…hold please…yeah Amy! Go Amy! That was hot…woo-hoo! Okay…I done…then well…the Red team pounced! Holding Darryl’s Nuts to well…no runs for the inning anyway…Duke makes a spectacular double play that almost looked like he was ‘tippy tippy toeing’ to tap 2nd before he rifle-arm throws it to KP for 2…I mean you could hear it! And see the smoke in KP’s glove! Then to finish it off Duke again throws to KP for the 3rd out…and now to the 3rd…anyone craving a pickle?
Everyone loves a good pickle don’t they? We just don’t have enough of them! Special thanks to Alex (Marquez) Porter for delivering the best pickle we have seen in years…I wish we could replay! So…after the pickle dust settles Jorge (Coche) Haynes singles…Kara doubles and Sean singles…KP’s Nuts have 1 more run on the board! The Black team holds onto their lead for another inning thanks to Darryl’s pickle dance for 1…a Meaghan to Meaghan out at 1st for 2…and Mike tags someone (I forget who) for 3…The bottom of the 3rd is one of those 3-up, 3-down kind of innings with Jose making a great line drive catch for 1…the AP to KP Connection for 2…and Paul making a great catch for 3…onto the 4th!
To the 4th…
Sorry that’s all I got….cause not much happened during this inning…except another intentional walk for Duke…and while I understand the strategery…it really sucks…its kinda like driving 30 miles per hour on the Autobahn…or never bothering to punch your Porsche out of 2nd gear…or one of those bad nightmares where you are trying to run for your life and just can’t quite get it going…oh…sorry I digress…I just like the hits man!
To the 5th then…the inning of mathematical enlightenment and hands in the air exercises…off we go. To be honest I’m not sure who led off for the Reds…cause these batting orders land me in the confusional! But we’ll say it was Paul…who sets the tone and slams himself a double…Dianna follows with a single…then Jose singles and the runs are starting to come in! More action follows as Kara singles and Alex doubles…and then a flash runs by us towards first base and all I hear is Sue’s voice yelling…RBI! I like that…she pay attention man! Before you know it the Reds have 4 more runs tying things up at 6 – 6…For the Black team it was the inning of Meaghan…with Darryl throwing to her for 1…Reaton to Meaghan for 2…and Reaton again to Meaghan for 3! Inning over…it’s 6 – 6…no really it is!
Enter the best little dispute in baseball…Nuts style! I mean this is better than anything that Club Fed ever brought to the table…we funny! So…it seems that the Black team was under the impression that the Reds only scored 3 runs in the 5th…thus making the score 6 – 5…and where did they get that impression? Hmmmm?? Well…I know they weren’t under the influence of Jell-O shots so it couldn’t have been that…Hmmmm?? Who planted the seed? And where did that person get their information?? From the tabloids…or some little bird…or the passengers in the JetBlue flight overhead?? Who knows…but they’re fired as Nuts spokesperson!
So…from there more “friendly” discussions ensue that include most of the players…most of the fans…and Blue…did someone wake up Blue by the way? Was it 4 runs…was it 3 runs…was it 4 runs…was it 3 runs?? Then the light bulbs clicked on! “Raise your hand if you scored” Utter genius! I mean forget the two scorekeepers…they don’t know what they’re doing…"raise your hands!” This has never been seen before on the field…somebody call MLB cause they NEED to employ this tactic right away! Just think of all the disputed plays that can be avoided in the future…genius I tell you!
Finally everyone settles down and the correct score is awarded…everyone hugs and decide we can go outside and play nicely together again…the team mom’s agree not to ground anyone for rough housing or name calling and off we go for more funsies!
The final inning people…Sean leads off for the Reds…he takes his base…Steve delivers a home run…Kara triples…that’s a triple people! Duke takes his base…Sue singles…Paul slams a grand slam-o-rama ding dong home run…Sin-D takes her base…Jose takes his base…Monique singles and 8 more runs have landed! The defense plays hard as Mike throws to Meaghan for 1…Meaghan makes a great stop for 2…and Jeanine makes a catch for 3…Great job Nuts and Nuts…collect your World Series rings on the way out…Bling!
A Few Collectable Quotes regarding that…you know…incident:
“If it wasn’t for home plate, no one would have scored” – Wally
“Roxy, get your muzzle…we need it” – The Ocho
"In a thousand years, who's going to care about that extra run?" – DD
I was heard to yell repeatedly from the first base coaching box: "Give it up, Robert. Let's just play the game" Now this coming from the one who won the final score pool and two innings for a grand total of $250. Little did I know that lobbying for that one run would be such a windfall for me - Pete Rose
"After the game, I laid down in bed looking up at the stars in the sky tyring to figure out just who scored in the game and thought to myself, "Wait, what happened to the ceiling?" - Be-Lee-Ve
“Raise your hand if you scored” - Everyone
And a few Stats for my Peeps:
Number of AP to KP Connections: 5
Number of double plays: 3
Darryl and Meaghan
Duke and Kara
Duke, Sin-D and Kara…hot!
Number of great plays involving Meaghan at 1st: 10
Number of great plays involving Kara at 1st: 12
Number of pickle plays: 2…but Alex’s was the best!
Total home runs: 3
Final score: Red Nuts 14 – Black Nuts 9
A few more words
…so by now you should have guessed what those 4 people in the beginning had in common…I see lots of hands…oh wait…I’m sorry…that’s just Robert’s cubicle! Hands in the air people…hands in the air!
And finally…Congratulations to Darryl’s team who have earned themselves a spot at the finals…um…against the Longshots…yeah…um…good luck with that!
No…I’m kidding…come out and cheer them on September 21st…same place…7:45! And if you have ever had the title of “Ringer” on your resume…Please see Darryl…Holla!
posted by Caron at 4:06 PM
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