Shake it Off, Rub Some Dirt on it!
Off in the distance, the game's dragging on,
There's strikes on the batter, some runners are on,
I don't know the inning, I've forgotten the score.
The whole team is yelling and I don't know what for,
Suddenly everyone's looking at me,
My mind has been wandering, what could it be?
They point to the sky and I look up above,
and the softball falls right into my glove…
Time for the playoffs we have been waiting many seasons for…Nuts vs Nuts Part Six, the All-star, Hall-of-Fame Edition….or something like that. With Kara’s Nuts in 1st and Darryl’s Nuts in 4th…a win for either team advances them to the finals…and wait for it…trophies and some serious water cooler bragging rights…so on to the show!
Enter Mike Schmidt Hinohosa…the 1st to face Duke Dizzy Dean Low…cue the at bat music…strike up the band…and turn on the sprinklers…or wait…let’s save that for later…when we’re really cold…and after we mix it up with a little controversy and stuff…ok…roll em.
Mike Schmidt is on with a double...and for some reason everyone after him wants one too…Dizzy Duke obliges…and Theresa Damon…Randy Ozzy Smith…Mindy Carew, Darryl Drysdale and Brian Lou Brock Lee all repeat the double thing….Doubles appear to be the new Black!
Amy (there are no Rovers in Baseball) Ahearn SLAMS a single…J-Dawg Spezio slams a double…Julie Piazza Alonso chops a single….and Cleaner Clemente is also on with a single…now you may think by now that Darryl’s team was having all the fun….Not True!
Eustacio Betemit makes a great catch for 1…then Eustacio, Bill Jeter and The Cardinal formerly known as J-Dawg decide to pickle…J-Dawg makes this belly flop leap back towards 2nd….but no go with Jeter in the way…he out…and he dirty! Hot! Hands off ladies….he’s Amy’s!
So when the dust clears…and Duke and Staci make the 3rd out…we done with this mini massacre…Kara wants her turn…punch it!
Derek Henderson McGriff is the 1st to face Double D…he slams a teeee-ripple! Bill slams a home run (hot!) and Kara’s Nuts are on the board! The score at the end of the 1st is 6 – 2…and yes I’m sure of it…just in case Blue wants to ask me about it or something…you never know.
Top of the 2…The Gold Nuts stop the D Nuts cold…with their 6 points…just to be clear and all…Steve Bonds Stuhr is up…and on…with a single…Sin-dee San Diego Chicken Cordova is on with a single and Jose is on with a single….meanwhile…in the in/out field…Randy picks off a few unsuspecting Nuts at 2nd for 1 and 2…and Randy to Meaghan Puhols for 3…the score is 6 – 3…yep 6 – 3.
Double D is up…facing the Duke…he slams a triple…Brian takes his base…and the Ocho is on with another single…yeah...Wonder Woman is hot tonight! In the field…Steve and Staci make some great plays to close the top of the 3rd…its 8 – 3…unless you’re Blue…in which case its 10 – 3…or something like that…off we go…
Eustacio leads off…he’s on with a single…Kara Olerud takes her base…Derek takes his base…and Bill Grand Slams a home run…smoking hot…and Duke is on with a single (it was a tough act to follow)…meanwhile…in the field J-Dawg makes a great catch somewhere in there and before we know it the inning is over! The score is 8 – 7…unless you’re Blue…in which case it’s 22 – 16…or something like that.
Top of the 4th…Cleaner is on with a single…Mike is on with a single…Randy takes his base…Mindy singles…Double D takes his base…and Darryl’s Nuts have 3 more on the board…according to me…but if you’re Blue…then it was 5 more runs…meanwhile in the in/out field Derek makes a great catch…and after some more great plays…which um didn’t get recorded…Darryl’s Nuts are out…and the score going into the bottom:
Caron: 8 – 7
Blue: 33 – 27 (or something like that)
To the bottom…I forget who leads off…but since the Gold Nuts made it through their batting order…and then some…I’ll just start with Derek…he’s on with a single…Staci Palmeiro is on with a single….Bill takes his base…KP is on with a single…Duke Grand Slams…Holla! Dianna is on with a single…she’s en fuego tonight…and it just keeps going…and going…and going (much Unlike the batteries in our boom box).
Back to the game…Steve is on with a single…Sin-dee is on with a single…Jose Wade Boggs Baldonado is on with a double (thanks for breaking up the singles mixer) and Sue Lazzeri takes her base…oh and Eustacio is on with a single…
…in the field Randy and Mindy take out a few Gold Nuts at 2nd…and Randy makes a great catch for 3…the Gold Nuts have 9 more runs on the board. The score:
Caron: 11 – 16
Blue: 43.5 – 19.3333333333 (or something like that)
To the 5th…Brian leads off…and slams a double…the Ocho is on with another single…J-Dawg doubles…and Darryl’s Nuts have another run…and are starting to inch their way back! The Bottom of the 5th brings no runs for the Gold Nuts…tension mounts as we head for the 6th…the fans on both sides in both stands are also feeling the pressure…it’s anyone’s game at this point…off we go…
Top of the 6th…Mike Schmidt lands a single…Theresa takes her base…Randy doubles…and Darryl takes his base…two more runs score for Darryl’s team and they inch even closer with a now 14 – 16 score…that’s the real score by the way…which means this game would be like…over…but Blue thinks it’s tied…16 all…so off we go for another round of Gold Nuts…hit it…
Derek leads off…and he’s on with a single…Bill gets to take a walk…Sue also gets to take a walk…(somewhere in here someone must have gotten out – cuz Sin-Dee got up – Bill got walked so DD could get to Sin-Dee – but Sin-Dee was ready and slammed a single to center field – she’s on 1st and the bases are loaded now while they’re strolling and walking and walking and strolling…and hitting…Dizzy Duke steps up…remember that look he gets when he really wants a piece of the ball…mouth watering…eyes bulging…hands wringing the bat like he was holding a fork at a big feast….that softball IS a juicy meatball…Smack! To the trees people…to the trees…home run! Congratulations Gold Nuts…you earn the honor to continue playing in this freezing cold weather…with umpire Bob and his bad attitude…but we in the stands are happy for you…and the jumping up and down is keeping us warm! Keep it up Gold Nuts…you’ve got one more round!
(If you were only interested in reading about game 1…here is where you want to check out). But if you’re still with me…off to playoff game 2…Malloy’s vs The Gold Nuts…word on the street is that Malloy’s has spent the last hour in a bar…we’ll take it…maybe they’ll miss a few…as Patti Cleaner Clemente says…”let’s get this potty started”…yeah that’s potty started…no typo…um…well…you had to be there!
The 1st…Duke employs the evenings popular strategery and walks the 1st guy…and some other Malloy’s do some other stuff…and well the runs start coming in…we in the stands want to make sure Blue stays honest…so we loudly repeat the score to him…all together (we rehearsed!) over and over again…
Back out on the field…A hot double play is in the works…Duke to Bill to Kara…and that’s 2…then Duke lands a strike-out for 3…Malloy’s has 9 runs on the board…we have them right where we want them…holla!
Gold Nuts are up…Bill sets the tone with a triple…Kara is on with a single…and Duke…again with the meatballs…slams a home run…we are so on the board…pause for score clarification with Blue…3 – 9…yep all in agreement…oh woops inning over…to the 2…
Ah yes…we hold the Misfit Malloys to 1 run…here’s how…Duke makes a great catch for 1…Duke to KP for 2…and a Duke strike out for 3…score check: 3 – 10…our turn.
Steve leads off with a double…Sue is on with a single and Eustacio slams a double…we’ve got 1 more on the board….score check: 4 – 10…to the 3rd…
Here we hold them to 2 runs…with some great plays by Bill and KP…and off course Sue’s feet…the Malloy’s are out!
It was the bottom of the 5th inning when the Gold Nuts really came to life…the score is 6 – 13 and we needed some runs…Eustacio leads off and slams a double…Kara repeats with another double…Derek also doubles….Dianna Bench Tavira makes it a double…and yeah…the doubles are back! So hot! Bill mixes it up with a triple…and why not…Staci sticks with the doubles…and Duke does something to get him on base…which apparently I didn’t bother to write down…my bad. But the Gold Nuts keep going with a double by Steve and another by Jose…we must have been jumping up and down so much in the stands that we needed to play in the sprinklers…screw the game…the sprinklers are on…woo-hoo!…All we need is a Slip and Slide and a Water Weenie and we’re good to go!
No really….that sprinkler thing kinda sucked…you’ve never seen sports fan move faster…not even with a foul ball coming…purses…papers and blankets flying…yeah…good times Whaley Park!
Anyway…there were 8 additional Gold Nut runs which put the score at 14 – 13…yep…we got them right where we want them!
To the 6th…7th and 8th…all a blur of sprinklers…umpire threats…discussion surrounding umpire threats…and well it’s hard to write when holding up your blanket! But here’s what we remember…Bill and Kara make another double play…Duke gets another round of strike-outs…and Sue makes a nice catch…we hold the Malloy’s to another 3 runs total. Our turn at bat has Bill bringing in Derek…who was on with a single…and we manage one more run…these last 3 innings were really stressful for us blanket holding Nuts fans…we were sooooo freakin close…but at final score check it was: Malloy’s 15 Nuts 14…a real great effort Gold Nuts and D Nuts…you rock and we love you!
The new season with warmer days and longer nights is coming soon. Along with the end of the season celebration…check back for schedules and rosters…holla!
Quotable Quotes:
“You’re out of the batters box…you’re out!” – Blue
“Ask me a question and you’re out!” – Blue
“Look at me wrong and you’re out!” – Blue
“I don’t like your outfit…you’re out! - Blue
“Be quiet…or I’ll get rid of you!” – Blue
“Be quiet…I’m on the phone!” – Blue
“Dead ball!” – Blue (In regard to any play that interrupted his phone conversation).
“I don’t want to hear it…that was 2 innings ago!” – Blue (In regard to his brilliant scoring calculations).
“Fumble” – Amy
“Our Rover is a chicken!” – Rebecca
“Our Rover is a skipping chicken!” – unnamed Nuts fan
“Our Rover is a skipping funky chicken!” – still unnamed Nuts fan
Blog on Blog on…
Next season is fast approaching and I’ve taken on some additional extracurricular writing projects…that means I’ll have less time to write these little masterpieces…so here’s a suggestion. If you want to set yourself up on Blogger (free and easy) you all can recount your games...have a little banter…you know like a real Blog…and then we get to hear from many voices rather than just reading my totally lame humor…anyway just a thought!
Peace out - Caron
There's strikes on the batter, some runners are on,
I don't know the inning, I've forgotten the score.
The whole team is yelling and I don't know what for,
Suddenly everyone's looking at me,
My mind has been wandering, what could it be?
They point to the sky and I look up above,
and the softball falls right into my glove…
Time for the playoffs we have been waiting many seasons for…Nuts vs Nuts Part Six, the All-star, Hall-of-Fame Edition….or something like that. With Kara’s Nuts in 1st and Darryl’s Nuts in 4th…a win for either team advances them to the finals…and wait for it…trophies and some serious water cooler bragging rights…so on to the show!
Enter Mike Schmidt Hinohosa…the 1st to face Duke Dizzy Dean Low…cue the at bat music…strike up the band…and turn on the sprinklers…or wait…let’s save that for later…when we’re really cold…and after we mix it up with a little controversy and stuff…ok…roll em.
Mike Schmidt is on with a double...and for some reason everyone after him wants one too…Dizzy Duke obliges…and Theresa Damon…Randy Ozzy Smith…Mindy Carew, Darryl Drysdale and Brian Lou Brock Lee all repeat the double thing….Doubles appear to be the new Black!
Amy (there are no Rovers in Baseball) Ahearn SLAMS a single…J-Dawg Spezio slams a double…Julie Piazza Alonso chops a single….and Cleaner Clemente is also on with a single…now you may think by now that Darryl’s team was having all the fun….Not True!
Eustacio Betemit makes a great catch for 1…then Eustacio, Bill Jeter and The Cardinal formerly known as J-Dawg decide to pickle…J-Dawg makes this belly flop leap back towards 2nd….but no go with Jeter in the way…he out…and he dirty! Hot! Hands off ladies….he’s Amy’s!
So when the dust clears…and Duke and Staci make the 3rd out…we done with this mini massacre…Kara wants her turn…punch it!
Derek Henderson McGriff is the 1st to face Double D…he slams a teeee-ripple! Bill slams a home run (hot!) and Kara’s Nuts are on the board! The score at the end of the 1st is 6 – 2…and yes I’m sure of it…just in case Blue wants to ask me about it or something…you never know.
Top of the 2…The Gold Nuts stop the D Nuts cold…with their 6 points…just to be clear and all…Steve Bonds Stuhr is up…and on…with a single…Sin-dee San Diego Chicken Cordova is on with a single and Jose is on with a single….meanwhile…in the in/out field…Randy picks off a few unsuspecting Nuts at 2nd for 1 and 2…and Randy to Meaghan Puhols for 3…the score is 6 – 3…yep 6 – 3.
Double D is up…facing the Duke…he slams a triple…Brian takes his base…and the Ocho is on with another single…yeah...Wonder Woman is hot tonight! In the field…Steve and Staci make some great plays to close the top of the 3rd…its 8 – 3…unless you’re Blue…in which case its 10 – 3…or something like that…off we go…
Eustacio leads off…he’s on with a single…Kara Olerud takes her base…Derek takes his base…and Bill Grand Slams a home run…smoking hot…and Duke is on with a single (it was a tough act to follow)…meanwhile…in the field J-Dawg makes a great catch somewhere in there and before we know it the inning is over! The score is 8 – 7…unless you’re Blue…in which case it’s 22 – 16…or something like that.
Top of the 4th…Cleaner is on with a single…Mike is on with a single…Randy takes his base…Mindy singles…Double D takes his base…and Darryl’s Nuts have 3 more on the board…according to me…but if you’re Blue…then it was 5 more runs…meanwhile in the in/out field Derek makes a great catch…and after some more great plays…which um didn’t get recorded…Darryl’s Nuts are out…and the score going into the bottom:
Caron: 8 – 7
Blue: 33 – 27 (or something like that)
To the bottom…I forget who leads off…but since the Gold Nuts made it through their batting order…and then some…I’ll just start with Derek…he’s on with a single…Staci Palmeiro is on with a single….Bill takes his base…KP is on with a single…Duke Grand Slams…Holla! Dianna is on with a single…she’s en fuego tonight…and it just keeps going…and going…and going (much Unlike the batteries in our boom box).
Back to the game…Steve is on with a single…Sin-dee is on with a single…Jose Wade Boggs Baldonado is on with a double (thanks for breaking up the singles mixer) and Sue Lazzeri takes her base…oh and Eustacio is on with a single…
…in the field Randy and Mindy take out a few Gold Nuts at 2nd…and Randy makes a great catch for 3…the Gold Nuts have 9 more runs on the board. The score:
Caron: 11 – 16
Blue: 43.5 – 19.3333333333 (or something like that)
To the 5th…Brian leads off…and slams a double…the Ocho is on with another single…J-Dawg doubles…and Darryl’s Nuts have another run…and are starting to inch their way back! The Bottom of the 5th brings no runs for the Gold Nuts…tension mounts as we head for the 6th…the fans on both sides in both stands are also feeling the pressure…it’s anyone’s game at this point…off we go…
Top of the 6th…Mike Schmidt lands a single…Theresa takes her base…Randy doubles…and Darryl takes his base…two more runs score for Darryl’s team and they inch even closer with a now 14 – 16 score…that’s the real score by the way…which means this game would be like…over…but Blue thinks it’s tied…16 all…so off we go for another round of Gold Nuts…hit it…
Derek leads off…and he’s on with a single…Bill gets to take a walk…Sue also gets to take a walk…(somewhere in here someone must have gotten out – cuz Sin-Dee got up – Bill got walked so DD could get to Sin-Dee – but Sin-Dee was ready and slammed a single to center field – she’s on 1st and the bases are loaded now while they’re strolling and walking and walking and strolling…and hitting…Dizzy Duke steps up…remember that look he gets when he really wants a piece of the ball…mouth watering…eyes bulging…hands wringing the bat like he was holding a fork at a big feast….that softball IS a juicy meatball…Smack! To the trees people…to the trees…home run! Congratulations Gold Nuts…you earn the honor to continue playing in this freezing cold weather…with umpire Bob and his bad attitude…but we in the stands are happy for you…and the jumping up and down is keeping us warm! Keep it up Gold Nuts…you’ve got one more round!
(If you were only interested in reading about game 1…here is where you want to check out). But if you’re still with me…off to playoff game 2…Malloy’s vs The Gold Nuts…word on the street is that Malloy’s has spent the last hour in a bar…we’ll take it…maybe they’ll miss a few…as Patti Cleaner Clemente says…”let’s get this potty started”…yeah that’s potty started…no typo…um…well…you had to be there!
The 1st…Duke employs the evenings popular strategery and walks the 1st guy…and some other Malloy’s do some other stuff…and well the runs start coming in…we in the stands want to make sure Blue stays honest…so we loudly repeat the score to him…all together (we rehearsed!) over and over again…
Back out on the field…A hot double play is in the works…Duke to Bill to Kara…and that’s 2…then Duke lands a strike-out for 3…Malloy’s has 9 runs on the board…we have them right where we want them…holla!
Gold Nuts are up…Bill sets the tone with a triple…Kara is on with a single…and Duke…again with the meatballs…slams a home run…we are so on the board…pause for score clarification with Blue…3 – 9…yep all in agreement…oh woops inning over…to the 2…
Ah yes…we hold the Misfit Malloys to 1 run…here’s how…Duke makes a great catch for 1…Duke to KP for 2…and a Duke strike out for 3…score check: 3 – 10…our turn.
Steve leads off with a double…Sue is on with a single and Eustacio slams a double…we’ve got 1 more on the board….score check: 4 – 10…to the 3rd…
Here we hold them to 2 runs…with some great plays by Bill and KP…and off course Sue’s feet…the Malloy’s are out!
It was the bottom of the 5th inning when the Gold Nuts really came to life…the score is 6 – 13 and we needed some runs…Eustacio leads off and slams a double…Kara repeats with another double…Derek also doubles….Dianna Bench Tavira makes it a double…and yeah…the doubles are back! So hot! Bill mixes it up with a triple…and why not…Staci sticks with the doubles…and Duke does something to get him on base…which apparently I didn’t bother to write down…my bad. But the Gold Nuts keep going with a double by Steve and another by Jose…we must have been jumping up and down so much in the stands that we needed to play in the sprinklers…screw the game…the sprinklers are on…woo-hoo!…All we need is a Slip and Slide and a Water Weenie and we’re good to go!
No really….that sprinkler thing kinda sucked…you’ve never seen sports fan move faster…not even with a foul ball coming…purses…papers and blankets flying…yeah…good times Whaley Park!
Anyway…there were 8 additional Gold Nut runs which put the score at 14 – 13…yep…we got them right where we want them!
To the 6th…7th and 8th…all a blur of sprinklers…umpire threats…discussion surrounding umpire threats…and well it’s hard to write when holding up your blanket! But here’s what we remember…Bill and Kara make another double play…Duke gets another round of strike-outs…and Sue makes a nice catch…we hold the Malloy’s to another 3 runs total. Our turn at bat has Bill bringing in Derek…who was on with a single…and we manage one more run…these last 3 innings were really stressful for us blanket holding Nuts fans…we were sooooo freakin close…but at final score check it was: Malloy’s 15 Nuts 14…a real great effort Gold Nuts and D Nuts…you rock and we love you!
The new season with warmer days and longer nights is coming soon. Along with the end of the season celebration…check back for schedules and rosters…holla!
Quotable Quotes:
“You’re out of the batters box…you’re out!” – Blue
“Ask me a question and you’re out!” – Blue
“Look at me wrong and you’re out!” – Blue
“I don’t like your outfit…you’re out! - Blue
“Be quiet…or I’ll get rid of you!” – Blue
“Be quiet…I’m on the phone!” – Blue
“Dead ball!” – Blue (In regard to any play that interrupted his phone conversation).
“I don’t want to hear it…that was 2 innings ago!” – Blue (In regard to his brilliant scoring calculations).
“Fumble” – Amy
“Our Rover is a chicken!” – Rebecca
“Our Rover is a skipping chicken!” – unnamed Nuts fan
“Our Rover is a skipping funky chicken!” – still unnamed Nuts fan
Blog on Blog on…
Next season is fast approaching and I’ve taken on some additional extracurricular writing projects…that means I’ll have less time to write these little masterpieces…so here’s a suggestion. If you want to set yourself up on Blogger (free and easy) you all can recount your games...have a little banter…you know like a real Blog…and then we get to hear from many voices rather than just reading my totally lame humor…anyway just a thought!
Peace out - Caron
posted by Caron at 2:22 PM
0 comments
